The 4 Major Lessons I Learned from Overcoming Cancer at 25

You’re Listening to The AntiFragile Entrepreneurship™ Podcast, Episode #20. Today we’re talking about my journey to beating cancer, developing a positive attitude, and learning positive thinking.

Today is a really special episode that’s near and dear to my heart. As most of you listening know, the whole reason I do the work I do today was because of the cancer diagnosis that happened to me when I was 25 years old. Or I should say it happened FOR me because without it, I hate to even imagine what my life would look like today, because up until the moment of that diagnosis I had been walking down a dangerous path, one that would’ve probably ended in self-destruction at one point or another. 

I’ve gotten a lot of requests from our listeners to talk more about this journey and what it was like beating cancer, and what I learned from it, which at first surprised me because I never would have dreamed this is something you guys wanted to hear more about. So on today’s special episode of The EffortLESS Life®, I’m going to dive deep with you to show you what it was like to get hit with this diagnosis at such a young age, how I felt going through surgery and radiation, beating cancer, and some of the big, life-changing decisions I had to make, and how these changed the entire trajectory of my life and business -- for the better. 

I’m going to discuss beating cancer, developing a positive attitude, and learning positive thinking. I have to be honest with you. Overcoming and beating cancer was NOT how I expected to start my journey as an entrepreneur. Sitting in that cold exam room, I learned first-hand that my relentless pursuit of success had come at a cost, but it wasn’t the cost of late nights at my desk, missed workouts to meet with clients, telling my friends (again) I didn’t have time to meet them for lunch, or the willpower it took to stay focused and get just one more thing scratched off my list. The real price I paid was my health, my friendships, my relationships, and so many of the things in life that truly mattered to me. That’s when I knew it was time to make a massive change and figure out how to break the cycle of burnout -- for good. 

And sitting in my doctor’s office that day, that was the moment I knew I had to figure out a different way – a way where I could still have the success I wanted, without missing out on my life in the process and developing a positive attitude and learning positive thinking. I also knew that beating cancer was the first thing. 

And that’s when I began to let myself wonder if just maybe, this unimaginable challenge was not my end… but my beginning. Beating cancer played a significant role. 

Because during my recovery from beating cancer, I vowed that if I was given a second chance, I would use my gifts and talents to help others before it got that bad for them. 

Yet little did I know that my journey of healing would turn into a global movement that impacted the lives of high-achievers like you across the globe.

So today, I want to show you 4 of the key factors that played a role in my healing, from beating cancer of my body… and from the beating cancer of burnout that was consuming my mind..

And I invite you to come with me on this journey, and listen closely, because my hope is that what I share with you inside this episode will help you wake up to the enormous cost of burnout that so much of the world is suffering with on many levels so that you can take what I’ve learned and start to make some changes NOW to help you get where you want to go, without working yourself to death in the process. It’s about beating cancer, developing a positive attitude, and learning positive thinking.

Also, I get that the topic of beating cancer might feel a little heavy, and that’s a GOOD thing, because if we were to just dance around it and say oh, yea, life goes on then we’d miss out on the opportunity to dig deep and LEARN and how to deal with beating cancer, developing a positive attitude, and learning positive thinking. So stick with me, I promise that you’ll leave this episode feeling empowered, inspired, and more confident in yourself than ever before.

[INTRO TRACK]

Welcome my friends! I’m really psyched to be doing this episode for you today, because even though a deep dive into my personal story of beating cancer, developing a positive attitude, and adopting positive thinking, like this was never something I’d imagined you’d want to hear from me, the more I thought about it the more I really started thinking about how valuable this could actually be. I’m going to share beating cancer, developing a positive attitude, and learning positive thinking.

Because once upon a time in the not-so-distant past, I sat exactly where you are. I used to dream of having time to work on special creative projects, travel more, do more fun things, and just enjoy life and spend more time with the people I loved. And now, after spending the past 6+ years researching stress, overwhelm, women, and wellness, I’ve built that life. It’s a huge gift to have the option of doing what I want, when I want, along with my family, and not to be worried that my company is going to fail if I’m not at my desk. Because being able to have more time and spend it the way you truly want, without feeling guilty, that is truly the ultimate luxury.

So we’re going to dive deep today, because I want to show you how you create the same kind of freedom in YOUR life, too. 

But before we jump into my story of beating cancer and then developing a positive attitude, I’ve gotta give a shout out to our featured listener of the week: Jackie @jacquelin_s_brooks 

But, I need to be honest with you. My life didn’t always look like it does now. In fact, it used to look nothing like it does now.  See, I started my career in the corporate world of 9 - 5, determined to climb my way up that ladder as fast as possible. I was overworked, underpaid, and I thought, “the faster I can get to the top, the faster I can enjoy the lifestyle I really want to have.” Now I’d had a lot of success for someone at my age and at the stage of my career I was in, but I was dreaming of more money, more time, and more freedom. So, I was the girl who’d show up to work early, work through lunch, take work home on the weekends, willing to do whatever it took to get promoted and move up the ranks. And around that time, a friend introduced me to the network marketing industry. She said I’d have far more earning potential, and could even grow to a point where I could walk away from my 9 - 5 job (or 8-to-faint, as I like to call it). 

I always wanted to own a business of my own and thought this could be a great way to gain business experience and reach my goals faster. I had a positive attitude and a lot of positive thinking. And I know a lot of you listening might be in a similar stage right now where you are working a job and a side hustle, or maybe you’re working a job but dream of owning a business of your own one day. Like you have this dream this idea in your head of how you want your life to look like at some point in the future, but you just haven’t figured out how to get there yet. That was me in 2013. 

So, all I had was this big dream -- this idea that I had no clue how to bring to life. I knew the first thing I needed to do would be to get my husband on board and let me tell ya, he had his doubts. My friends and family thought I was nuts. I remember hearing things like “is that realistic?” and they would try and talk me out of it and convince me why staying at this soul-sucking 9 - 5 was “more secure and more stable long-term”. I just remember rolling my eyes to myself and thinking” I’m going to go all in and I don’t care if nobody believes I can do it.” Maybe right now you have friends, family members in your ear saying “Idk if that’s realistic, maybe you should have a plan b” things like that and you have to continually put your blinders on and stay focused on your vision. That was me too. But I know I needed a positive attitude to adopt positive thinking.

I mistakenly thought that my success depended on how much I worked… and if I wasn’t working, then I wasn’t going to be successful. And if I wasn’t successful, then I’d be a failure. And I didn’t want to fail. 

And I definitely didn’t want to fail. I was all about developing a positive attitude and learning positive thinking. I’d experienced huge success early on in my career, but little did I realize that the years of overwork and overwhelm I thought were taking me closer to my goals had actually taken me further away from them.

No matter how many hours I put in, I still couldn’t seem to reach my dream lifestyle. My income was inconsistent. I felt overwhelmed, scattered, and stuck. And worst of all, I felt like no matter how much I did, it was never enough. It was e-x-h-a-u-s-t-i-n-g.

Unfortunately, I didn’t know then what I know now, so I didn’t think I had any choice. I didn’t feel like there was any other way. Maybe you can relate.

And then, two days after we got home from our honeymoon, I had a 2x4 come out of nowhere and hit me over the head, to wake me up to the fact that I wasn’t working, and that I had to figure out a different way, or I was going to lose everything that I’d worked for up until that point. It was strange beating cancer, developing a positive attitude, and learning positive thinking.

People ask me all the time, “how did you KNOW you had cancer? Did you have symptoms? Did you feel like something was off?” 

I’d had a bad sinus infection before the wedding, so I figured, “oh, it’s because I’m just so stressed. Once this wedding is behind me, then I’ll be able to breathe a bit.” Turns out that’s what I told myself in pretty much every area of my life -- always living for the light at the end of the tunnel like that. Saying to myself things like “once I hit this goal, THEN I can relax.” “Once I make 6 figures, THEN I can hire help” But the light I was looking for never came. 

I had a follow-up visit scheduled after our honeymoon, and went in to see my Dr. expecting to get a clean bill of health. I felt fine, nothing seemed out of the ordinary. But as I sat there in that cold, sterile exam room, with that awful fluorescent light flickering overhead, I started to get this awful feeling in the pit of my stomach. And never in a million years would I have imagined what was coming next unless it was positive thinking and a positive attitude.

Because that was the day that my Dr came into the room, sat down, looked me in the eye, and told me I had cancer. 

That was the day my life changed forever. 

I was 25 years old. I had everything going for me. I had my whole life ahead of me. A bucket list of things still to do, a ton of goals and dreams still to accomplish. A family to start. A legacy to leave. And in that instant, I realized that my years of overwork that I thought were taking me closer to my goals had cost me. 

Growing up, my mom always told me, “Courtney, getting sick is God’s way of slowing you down.” I’d roll my eyes and then curse under my breath because every day I stayed sick, my to-do list would grow that much longer. 

But here I was... forced to slow down long enough to pay attention. The break-neck pace that I was living at had finally broken me.

Looking back now I can’t say I didn’t see it coming and I didn’t know what beating cancer would do and mean. I had been sacrificing my life for too long, going through the motions, living with exhaustion and burnout, always giving time and energy that I didn’t really have to give. 

But this was rock bottom. Because now, I couldn’t work, even if I wanted to. My business, my family, everything had to be put on hold. And I finally got the time I was always saying I wanted to focus on myself. It’s just that going through surgery and radiation, being quarantined in the hospital was NOT how I envisioned it. 

And that was the moment everything shifted. I knew I had to figure out a different way -- a way where I could have the success and accomplishments I wanted, without giving up or missing out on life along the way. 

So that’s why I decided to quit burning myself out, feeling like I had to choose between having success or having a life I truly loved, and figure out how to have both. 

Yet when I chose to walk away from my fast-paced career and all of the success I’d experienced to that point, it wasn’t to escape the stress and overwhelm or figure out how to get rid of it as most people might think.

It was to find the answer to a much deeper question: “WHY do stress, overwhelm, and burnout happen in the first place, especially to people who are pursuing their passion and working toward their dreams?” 

It’s a good question, right? See before, I’d been asking myself a different question. It was more along the lines of: What ELSE can I do to reach the level of success I want faster so that I quit feeling so stressed and enjoy my life? What are the keys to beating cancer in everyday life?

And that was the wrong question to be asking. Because the only answer I kept finding was, to do more, stay up later, work harder, pile more on my plate, and do whatever it took to reach my goals as fast as possible, thinking that when I did, then I’d be able to coast and enjoy life. 

I didn't realize that the one thing this depended on was me actually being physically and mentally available to do it. It was like I was in a race to the finish line; I knew that the way I was doing things wasn’t sustainable long-term. Nobody can sprint all out forever. But I thought that if I just ran hard enough, for long enough, I’d make it to that finish line before something came along and took me out of the race. 

I was wrong. I was looking at things from the outside in, instead of from the inside out. 

I was looking at all the things that weren’t working, the things that were broken, the things I needed to take care of and fix so that I could stop stressing so much and just experience a little more freedom and enjoy life. It never even crossed my mind that being so focused on fixing all those things WAS the problem. And now I tell my students this: the only work that matters in life is the work you do on YOURSELF. You have to flip the script and start to look within yourself at the things that need healing, not outside of yourself at the things that need fixing. 

A color-coded schedule and a perfectly organized office and a pristine home and killer body from your meal-prepped kitchen and a perfectly balanced workout schedule are NOT going to fix the deeper problems under the surface. 

The problem with our culture is that most people think that’s the answer. That it’s your external world that needs fixing. And I get it. In a world that screams you need better self care practices and better time management strategies in place to optimize your productivity and a more successful, integrated life, so you can be your best self and free up your time to work your butt off so you can reach your goals faster, it can be really hard to dial into the truth. These temporary strategies only add to the real problem that’s causing the epidemic of overwork and overwhelm in our culture. Trying to fix the problem of stress and overwhelm from the outside in is a broken approach. In order to get results that last, you have to go much deeper. You have to be willing to do the inner work that matters. You have to fix the problem from the inside out to experience true, lasting transformation and achieve the next level of success. You have to be willing to learn why developing a positive attitude, and learning positive thinking is the key. This is what most people aren’t doing.

And that brings me to what I really want to share with you today: 4 of the key factors that played a role in my healing, from cancer of my body yes, but more importantly, healing from the cancer of burnout that had consumed my mind.

The first thing I did was to stop focusing on what I didn’t want, and start focusing on what I did want, as well as a positive attitude and positive thinking. I used to carry around this really deep rooted fear of getting sick, and of burning out. But by focusing on what I didn’t want, I believe it actually helped me create that. You’ve probably heard it said that where your focus goes, your energy flows. And most of us, unknowingly, are focused on the things we DON’T want to happen. Maybe you’ve heard of the Law of Attraction. It’s The belief that you can actually bring positive or negative experiences into your life based on your thoughts. And what’s important to realize is that this doesn’t just go for your conscious thoughts – more importantly, UNconscious thoughts. “where your focus goes, your energy flows” and the same goes for your thoughts! 

This is why it’s so important to start paying attention to our words you speak, because they are indicative of the thoughts you’re thinking, and also to pay really close attention to your self talk -- the things you say when no one’s around. Is it focused more on what you DO want, what you do have, what you ARE excited about in your life or is focused on what you DON’T want, what you’re tired of, the pain you’re working so hard to escape? The only way to break the cycle is to stop playing the game. You can choose to take charge and redirect your energy – you have control over your energy! If you are ever at a loss as to what to do or where to begin, take charge of your energy first and pay attention to where it’s going. And that’s what I did. Learn how to be friends with and welcome my emotions. Instead of trying to numb them with being busy to distract myself from feeling these uncomfortable emotions, the self doubt, and the criticism which I was constantly beating myself up with in my own mind, I chose to turn toward the feelings and actually feel them. And when you do this, it liberates their fundamental essence, which is ENERGY. So long story short, by tuning into your emotions under the surface and focusing on healing those first, it will FREE UP YOUR ENERGY that currently feels so bogged down and stressed. 

Have you ever looked at someone, maybe an influencer on instagram, maybe that person you heard speak from stage at a conference who really just inspired you, someone you’ve thought to yourself wow, I wish I could be like THAT? I wish I had that positive attitude and positive thinking process? They are operating on a different wavelength than you are currently. And in order to get to the wavelength that they are operating from, you have to free up your energy that’s currently focused elsewhere in order to do it. I don’t want to get too much into the weeds here! But this is the bottom line. Whenever you feel stressed or burnt out, that’s a direct result of where your ENERGY has been going lately, whether you realize it or not. You have to be willing to learn the steps to, developing a positive attitude and learning positive thinking. Ok. The next thing I did on my healing journey was I quit listening to the wrong people which helped me adopt a positive attitude and positive thinking -- I tuned out the outer voices and started listening to my own which helped me with beating cancer--the kind in everyday life. Let me give you a really good example of this that I think will paint you a really powerful picture. Recently found myself sitting in the airport, sitting at the gate, noticing A LOT of thoughts going through my head as I watched the people around me line up to board our flight.

“did I make the right decision?”

“do I need to have a positive attitude for this flight?” 

“how can I develop positive thinking processes about traveling?’

“just go and enjoy yourself, it’ll be fun!”

“what the @#(*&% are you thinking?!”

“he’s surrounded by people he loves, you’ve got nothing to worry about”

“5 whole days is far too long to leave your child!”

“it’s hard, but sometimes you have to just do you”

In fact, I was hyper-aware of these voices because I’d literally just taught a 3-day Retreat where we dove deep into how to distinguish between voices in your head that are truly yours vs. voices that aren’t.

And as I sat there listening to this brain chatter, it was fascinating to me to notice whose voices I heard. I heard my mom’s voice, I heard Alan’s. I heard the Lyft driver who drove me to the airport. My sister’s. Other voices that I couldn’t put a name to, but on a gut-level, I knew they weren’t mine.

Then one voice, quiet at first, finally spoke up a little louder than the others. And it said this: “You’re doing the best you can, with what you know, to the best of your ability. Use this time to recharge so you can come back as an even better version of the wife, mom, and woman you know you’re capable of being.”

I nodded and smiled because I knew, without a doubt, whose voice that was. It was mine. So, the moral of the story is this: next time you feel anxious, guilty, overwhelmed, or worried, pay attention. First, notice what the voices in your head are telling you.

Then, notice whose voices they are. Too often we fail to follow our heart and instead get lost following someone else’s opinion. But I promise you, the longer you keep doing that, the slower progress you’ll make. And the faster you learn to distinguish and listen to your own voice, your inner knowing, your conscience, your gut, whatever you call it, the faster you’ll experience growth like you never would have imagined otherwise. It’s time to start tuning OUT  the chatter and the noise around us and tune IN to discover the truth that in our hearts — the one that’s already written inside of you. And let me just say, it’s EMPOWERING like nothing you’ve ever experienced before, when you start to tune into YOU.

I started focusing on what I did want to create more of in my life. I learned how to pay attention to MY voice inside. And then, I started asking myself better questions about why I needed to learn about developing a positive attitude, and learning positive thinking. If you follow James Wedmore or listen to his podcast, you might’ve heard him say before that the quality of your life is determined by the quality of the questions you ask yourself, a positive attitude, and positive thinking--all of which are great at beating cancer--the kind that weighs you down in life.. James and I are friends and when we first met I heard him say this and I was like dang. I’ve been doing this forever! But, I didn’t come up with this quote so I’ve gotta give him credit because it’s so true. One of the keys to huge personal growth and transformation is to start asking yourself better questions, so you can start getting better answers, so you can develop a positive attitude. 

So I mentioned earlier that I traded the main question I was asking myself before, which was “how can I achieve XYZ faster” because the answer I kept getting to that was to pile more on my plate, and that wasn’t working. And on a big scale I started looking at my life through the lens of this question: “WHAT caused all this stress, overwhelm, and burnout to happen to me in the first place, and WHY do stress and burnout happen at such a staggering rate among people who are pursuing their passion and working toward their dreams?” 

That was the question I started asking myself in terms of my life and business. But there was another question I started asking myself on a personal level, which was “Why did you need this illness?” Dr. Bernie Siegel is the one who first started asking this question to his patients, and many of them were shocked, surprised, offended, some probably fired him as their doctor, because everyone is looking for a quick fix. We’re so ingrained in that mentality. But here’s the truth: Our bodies break down to give us a message, and many times it’s a message we’ve been ignoring. 

And the answers that came to me were pretty shocking. I won’t go into all the details here but there were some major relationships in my life that I’d been neglecting, pursuing work and worth at the expense of my wellbeing. And that directly impacted how I was able to show up in the world and interact with others, especially the people closest to me. There are two really good books I want to recommend here to you that if you’ve been struggling with some sort of physical ailment: whether it’s fatigue, poor sleep, headaches, gut issues, just about any issue you can imagine, there’s a deeper, underlying emotional connection. And THAT is what you need to tend to, and heal from the inside out, and the symptoms -- all those physical ailments, will reduce dramatically or even go away completely. So the first book is Your Body Keeps the Score, by Dr. Bessel Van Der Kolk and the second one is You Can Heal Your Life, by Louise Hay. We’ll link up to these in the show notes. I highly, highly recommend you put these at the top of your reading list right now. Don’t pick up another business book or until you read these first. That’s all I’m gonna say. Go do it. 

This brings us to the 4th key piece that I focused on on my journey of healing and the beating cancer of everyday living. I invested in external support. It freaked me the heck out, because it wasn’t just about me putting money down on a program I wanted to learn from, it was an investment in myself. There was an emotional commitment involved. To me it meant I was in it for the long haul, and that I was committing to what I said I wanted to do in my life. And I knew that what I’d been doing, trying to figure it out all on my own, the cheap way, wasn’t working. I needed an outside perspective. I also needed to develop a positive attitude and positive thinking.

I needed someone to support me and guide me and show me how to take all the fragmented pieces of my life and make them whole. And hiring my first coach wasn’t easy. There was a huge financial investment involved, which was more than I’d EVER spent on myself in my life -- had to shift that mindset quickly that I wasn’t spending money that I wouldn’t get back, but rather I was investing in myself for the long term--developing a positive attitude and maintaining a positive thinking process. And I really believed that. And without that outside help, I wouldn’t have been able to grow my business to where it is today, in just over 3 years. It’s AMAZING how quickly you start to see results when you flip the script and start approaching your life from the inside out, rather than the outside in. 

So these are the 4 things I did. I know some of them might seem counterintuitive, like wait, you started focusing on your emotions and healing those rather than trying to heal your body? Yes. Because of how our emotions directly impact our physical state, and no one teaches you this stuff. Well I do, but I mean in terms of what we learn in school, or what we’re taught by our parents, leaders, culture -- we’re not taught how to pay attention and navigate through the emotional landscape that makes up and directly affects everything else we do in life. 

And sure, of course I focused on ways to heal my body itself, to detox from radiation, to balance out my hormones to beating cancer. I’ve done everything from long-term juicing, to biohacking, intermittent fasting, keto, eating for my blood type, testing for inflammatory foods, heavy metal detox protocols, and all that sort of thing. Little side note here: if you want to learn how to pay attention and take better care of you from a physical standpoint, I can dish on this topic for hours. So that would probably be best served up in it’s own episode. But I’ll leave that up to you. If you want to hear more about that specifically from me, hit up my DM’s on Instagram and let me know so that I can do a special bonus video or something for you guys, just for being such loyal listeners. 

Hands down, the biggest piece of healing my body was was healing the root issues that were causing stress and overwhelm in my life and all these symptoms in the first place, including cancer and beating cancer, because YES I see that as a symptom of the deeper, underlying issues that were going on for me. A serious symptom, a life-changing symptom, but a symptom nonetheless. That, and beginning to lean in and rediscover my voice and find my identity again outside of what I did, of my work, were hugely instrumental in my journey of healing and beating cancer.

I have an intimate and intuitive understanding of where you are in your journey because I’ve walked that road. I’ve learned the importance of having a positive attitude and positive thinking.  And I’ve also developed the training, experience and expertise to guide you to where they want to be. Because I’m so quickly able to help people recognize and shift the underlying beliefs that drive their behavior is the reason my students and clients get such quick and lasting results. It’s tough when you’re working in a culture that screams “hustle and hard work is the key to your success.” 

And I get that my approach is sorta counter-cultural. Yet it’s also how I’ve helped my clients go from virtually $0 to $3M in sales in a single month; celebrate $5-figure launches, gain unsolicited media attention without spending late nights working or taking time away from the kids; go from crippling self-doubt and paralyzing fear to feeling more confident and empowered from within than ever before in a matter of days, and even building the business of my dreams working less than 20 hours a week with a very small team.

There is a human behind every business, and a business on its own is nothing without the human behind it. If the human is suffering, struggling, hurting... you can bet that your business will feel the effects. If the human isn’t growing, you can bet that the business won’t grow like you want it to, either (it can’t). 

⁠⁣⁠So that’s why I empower you to change the lens through which you’re currently seeing your life so that you can heal the deeper root issues that are causing the symptoms of stress and frustration and burnout, and even physical illness that you may be experiencing. It’s important to learn why developing a positive attitude and learning positive thinking are the keys to success.

I'm here to help you step into their power as the visionary leader you’ve been created to be. 

That’s why the system I created, The EffortLESS Life® Method, is so powerful. It was created for the person who is stuck, stressed, and struggling to grow no matter how hard they work, because I used to BE this person, and I created my entire company for her -- for me 5 years ago, before I started out on this journey.

You were put on this earth with power and purpose. You have unique gifts, and you deserve to fulfill your mission and make an impact. You shouldn't have to choose between success or family, work or relationships, business or life.  You should know why developing a positive attitude and learning positive thinking are the keys to success.

So. It’s time to quit buying into the belief that “doing more = faster success.” It doesn’t work like that. You’ve heard me say this before, and you’ll hear me say it again. It’s not just something that I preach; it’s something that I live. Doing MORE to get there faster is NOT the answer… and despite what our culture has seduced you to believe, it’s not the only way. You need to uncover and heal the root of the issue. If you feel stressed, stuck, and like you’re spinning your wheels, don’t worry. I’ve got you.

I hope this was helpful for you--I hope you found inspiration in my story of beating cancer, developing a positive attitude, and learning positive thinking.. I hope that it helped you understand my journey a bit more so that you can understand my heart; so you can understand WHY I do what I do. It’s not just a business, it’s not just a way to make money. It’s a mission, and it’s my calling. And I hope that some of the AHAs I’ve learned along the way, you’ll take to heart here too so you can shortcut the process a little bit, and transform and grow and get rid of the things that are holding you back

And if you feel like you need support in doing that please reach out. Our entire team is here to support YOU. 

That does it for today on beating cancer, developing a positive attitude, and learning positive thinking. I'll see you back here next week on The AntiFragile Entrepreneurship™ Podcast, until then, go live your EffortLESS Life®.